Lucky 13 (Mirys' Diary)

Today it is in English. Because today is our day and English is our language. Or was... I don´t really know!...

I have two favorite numbers: 7 (thanks to my dad) and 13. Like then both. Always trying to make associations with them both. Even the kids know about it! Everytime we "play maths", they find a way to the calculation to end in 7. Or 13...

And today is a 13th for me. It should be my 13th anniversary. It should be... but it is not. Because there´s no anniversary for just one to celebrate. It´s a sharing moment, a thing for two, one special date for two people. There´s no point in remembering this alone, all by my self! Even so...

I´m still here. Wishing I could have my annual kissing picture. Wishing I have had my breakfast in bed. Wishing I was planning a "surprise" dinner for tonight. Wishing he was still with me even if it was just to make me upset and angry and sad and exaust for fighting all day long for no matter what. But here! Like in the other 11s anniversaries...

Today I must confess I´m a little bit relieved that my son has a fever and the things on my daughter´s school went all wrong. At least, I have other important things to think about. Because I don´t like to be a sad and complaining person. I had 11 years of marriage! I had 15 years with an incredible man! I had poems, hugs, kissing, children, victories, musics... just for me! Com´on! I´m beyond blessed! I know it and I´m grateful for all that.

But still... it hurts... and I have no one to share this pain with...